Good night world~

I'm gonna talk a but about yesterday, because I really didn't have the strength to write then. So, Amazon prime came through and actually delivered a very very special thing and that is my mom's Christmas presents. We had... A little confrontation, not gonna lie, I threw jokes around because that's what I do to cope, but she admitted what I've been thinking she was doing to me through all my life and I want to demonstrate how proud I am of her for doing that. I found that we're extremely similar in our personalities, the way we handle things, and specifically the background that made us this way. Came up strong personality, big mouth, lots of confidence, traumatic even that canceled part of how childhood/teenage years and took us straight to adulthood and a tendency to be waaaaay to nice to undeserving people, and we tend to cut off people from our lives without a second thought because of it. So... Yeah, she admitted a really important thing and I'm proud of her, that's it, so I'm gonna give her a big present. Today was... Heavy, it felt heavy, I feel heavy, i still feel like an unwanted guest in my home, and it's not nice... Yesterday I couldn't fall asleep for the life of me because my brain was just running and running and I was exhausted but completely unable to shut it off. I didn't want to do anything, but I filmed anyway, I skimmed through the footage and it looks good, so thank God for that, I hope that tomorrow I'll be able to be a little more fresh and ready to work.